Momservation: You have not earned your stripes as a mother until you utter the ridiculous, over-used, eye-rolling phrases your mother used to say.

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The other day I tripped over my daughter’s soccer cleat I had asked her to pick up more times than I should’ve. “God Bless America!” I yelled both in pain and anger.

Then I looked around to see how my mother ended up in the room. Was that me? How long had I been using one of her favorite tag lines? When did I give up on my own bag of parenting tricks to reach into my mother’s?

“I’ll be darned,” I said aloud.

Another one! I clamped my hand over my mouth before another of my mom’s Momisms (as we liked to call them) could pop out. If a “Believe you me!” came out of my mouth next I was going to run and look in the mirror a la “Freaky Friday.”

I always thought all my mom’s common threats and sayings were like background noise. It seemed she was always yelling one of them at us, but you didn’t pay attention until her tone changed or it was preceded by a “God Bless America!”

My mom was not a cusser. So if you did ever hear foul language come out of her mouth, you were about to be in deep kimchi (busted) and you better run for the hills (in big trouble).

I used to think my mom’s Momisms were silly rather than effective and was sure as a parent I would come up with better communication and expectations for my kids. Because you know, we always think we’re going to do better.

But you know what? At some point we all turn into our mothers, hopefully giving her the respect and admiration she finally deserves. That’s because loving your kids and wanting help and guide them into being the best people they can be doesn’t change. It’s every parent’s wish to see their child succeed and be happy. And to that end, you will inevitably find yourself saying the things that parents have and will always say to their kids to keep them on the right path.

Even if it is yelling at the top of our lungs, “Do you hear me?”

And trust me, you don’t want to reply, “Geez, Mom. The whole neighborhood can hear you.” Deep kimchi.

Favorite Momisms and Their Meanings

1. If I have to tell you one more time…(said right before you’ve pushed it too far)
2. You have until the count of three…(but everyone knows you’ll get the extra 2 ½ and 2 ¾
3. Did you hear what I just said or do you hear me? (yelled at the top of your lungs)
4. I don’t want to hear it…(so don’t waste your breath)
5. I don’t care who started it…(justice is not going to be served)
6. I sound like a broken record player…(this still gets the point across despite today’s children having no idea what that is)
7. What, are your arms broken? (Warning shot over the bow, you better start helping)
8. Do I look like a waitress to you? (Can also be replaced with maid, chauffer, cleaning lady…)
9. You better run for the hills! (Someone’s getting in trouble)
10. You’re in deep kimchi! (Might be known as a spicy Korean food in some cultures but to us it meant you’re busted)
11. God bless America! (Big trouble. If this is replaced with an expletive SUPER big trouble)
12. What did you just say? (The calmer this is said, the bigger trouble you’re in)
13. You get over here right now! (The last thing you want to do but to defy it would be bigger trouble)
14. Do you think I’m going to pay for that with my good looks? (too expensive)
15. I’ll give you something to cry about… (empty threat but a warning none the less)
16. If you’re bored I’ll give you something to do… (worse than #14 because you will indeed be put you to work)
17.  Believe you me…(Never sure what this meant only that you had just stepped into a lecture)
18. When your father hears about this… (bought some time until punishment, but may not be a good thing)
19. If I ever see you do that again… (got away with a warning this time)
20. You should know better than that… (maybe, but had to test it anyway)
21. What were you thinking? (that you wouldn’t get caught)
22. Go to your room and don’t come out until I tell you…(understood you’ll still ask 50 times when you can come out)
23. Oh Fuzzolis, Ding-dang-darn, oh shoot (replacements for the “F-word,” “D-word,” and “S-word” which is always irresistibly followed by “Bang”)
24. What don’t you understand about “No?” (it was worth another shot)
25. I love you to pieces. (There was never any doubt about it)