Momservation: The miracle of Christmas might just be that we survive it.

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I WAS TOO BUSY TO WRITE THIS BLOG BECAUSE:

… I was putting away my Halloween decorations so I could put out my Christmas decorations.

… I was making my husband and kids stand by every potential perfect Christmas tree in the lot, then spent another half hour making them spin the trees for final inspection and selection.

… I was procrastinating putting the lights on the Christmas tree and instead went outside to nag my husband about putting all the exterior lights on properly.

… I had to clean my house before I could put decorations out although I did consider passing off dust bunnies as garland and disguising my laundry piles as the three wise men.

… I needed to get 10 tubs of Christmas decorations put out before it became an exercise in futility and I just gave up and put the Valentine decorations out instead.

… My Christmas cards still refused to address themselves and I couldn’t let a great silly family photo go unseen by 150 of my closest friends and family. Or people who I forgot until they sent me a card and then I had to scramble to send them one.

… I had to keep the tradition alive and get a photo with Santa and the kids even if it meant hitting the strip mall Santa two towns over with his security guard to avoid the long lines at the local mall.

… I was racing from store to store in search of elusive toys requested from Santa. The older the kids, the harder it is to redirect them to what they really want (and what you already bought).

… of Christmas shopping. The closer it gets to Christmas the better those As Seen On TV! junk starts to look like perfect gifts for the ones you love.

… I’m wrapping presents. The first few gifts are festive, glorious works of paper art and ribbon. The rest are lucky to have tape and it scrawled somewhere on it who it’s for with a Sharpie®.

… I’m trying to be the first in line at the post office. If I took into account how much it cost to mail presents to loved ones far away, they’d all be getting feather dusters or sock slippers.

… I was just notified by my children I need to get teacher gifts, bring something for the class Christmas party, a Secret Santa gift, a book for a book exchange, food and unwrapped toy to donate to needy families, and to show up for a last minute go-ahead on a non-denominational school holiday musical they’re performing in.

… I was too busy tipping back liquid courage at holiday parties to get me through the rest of the Christmas season.

… I decided to watch “Home Alone” with the kids and laugh at every weenie hit and fall down a flight of stairs with them.

… we ordered pizza then went for a family drive to look at neighborhood Christmas lights.

… the kids and I had fun in the kitchen making holiday cookies together, then brought them to friends and neighbors.

… we turned on “The Chipmunk Song,” “Nuttin’ For Christmas,” “Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer,” and danced and sang until our sides hurt from laughing.

… I gave the kids money and took them “dime store” shopping, getting a kick out of the gifts they selected for loved ones.

… I was busy popping popcorn and watching classic Christmas cartoons with the kids.

… I need to save energy for those “some assembly required” gifts that need to be put together midnight Christmas Eve.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. See you in 2010!